Hogtown Harmonics

With the exception of Brand New and Radiohead (possibly Muse if the venue was right), I have no desire to ever attend a big-ticket concert again. During my teens and very early 20s (whoah, how old am I?) I must have spent nearly $1000 on concerts. At the time I enjoyed them, but in the last two years or so I have become quite disillusioned with and ultimately tired of large-scale concerts. There are too many sweaty assholes in polo shirts (no matter who the band is.... I can only guess that these concert bros all work for various cell phone companies and get the tickets for free), too many girls in tank tops who pre-drank a couple of bottles of Vex and thus belligerently shout out the band's most popular song (even after they've played it), too many sponsors trying to shove promotional products in your face (wow, a Rockstar Energy Drink rape whistle!), too many people in line for the washroom, too many dollars required for a beer ($7 for a poorly poured plastic cup-full of Molson Candian?!), and ultimately, too much hubbub.

As a result of this disillusionment and overall irritation, I have turned my focus primarily to smaller-scale shows that feature either under-the-radar touring acts or local bands. In fact, the last large concert I attended, sadly, was that Edge 102 Christmas-type one with Metric, Tokyo Police Club, Sebastien Grainger, and some other band I have completely forgotten. Needless to say (though I will say it anyway.....making "needless to say" rather needless to say), I did not particularly enjoy it and actually left after about three of Metric's songs (I fully missed Grainger's set....what kind of concert starts at 8pm?!), having only seen a yawn-inducing set by Tokyo Police Club.

In the spirit of my recent musical xenophobia, this "Hogtown Harmonics" feature will be a multi-volume cataloging of some of the finest (and some mediocre) Toronto-area bands I have seen and been associated with over the past year or so.

Brides

Originally hailing from Guelph, this six-piece avant-garde no-wave group appears to be the current feature flavour in Toronto. Their songs are heavy on musicianship, as the vocals generally are quite minimalist and turned down rather low in the mix. Dare I say, Brides even has a jam-band quality to them, as it feels like many of their songs foray into stretched out, somewhat repetitive instrumental breaks. In this case, "jam-band" is not to be associated with any of the following: hemp, ponchos, bare feet, dandelions, manic sexualized swaying, or Phil Lesh. The "jamming" in Brides is always tasteful and pretentious—the latter being what the Toronto indie community seems to eat up.

I first saw Brides last fall (after a failed attempt to see them at Extermination Music Night last summer.... the police shut it down literally as Brides were about to start their first song) at The Drake Underground with Tradition and Slim Twig. Then I saw them at Wavelength, open for METZ at Trash Palace, at 69 Vintage By The Pound with Gay Beast and Dead Wife, and possibly in a Doritos commercial. What I am trying to say is that they've gotten a lot of exposure as late. Some other notable shows they played: opening for Ponytail at Deleon White Gallery and opening for Abe Vigoda at El Mo. In fact, I am starting to feel as though this exposure morphing to overexposure. Come on, a show every other week? It's getting to be a bit much for me.

I suspect that they are being groomed for a signing with a record label in the near-future, hence their plethora of shows (perhaps with We Are Busy Bodies? They've played with METZ, are about to play a show with dd/mm/yyyy in a few weeks [shhhh, no one's supposed to know that dd/mm/yyyy are on the bill, it's a surprise], and have become a favourite of promoter-cum-art thing Primary Colours).

They only have one song on their myspace at the moment and have only one very limited release to date, so I would direct you to their CBC Radio 3 page to have a listen.

photo credit: Sombre Reptiles

EDIT: To begin with, Brides now have two new unmastered tracks from their upcoming full-length streaming on their myspace. As well, despite my speculation of the band releasing their full-length on We Are Busy Bodies, I will now speculate that said full-length may be released on Blocks Recording Club, as the band is playing Blocks' showcase at Pop Montreal in October.

World Map Forever!

After months of searching, I have finally found Abe Vigoda's first album, 2006's Sky Route/Star Roof. A well-deserved sigh of relief and a pat on the back. You see, this LP only saw two pressings: the first being 300 copies on grey vinyl, the second 350 copies on black vinyl. That means, as I'm sure most of you calculated, that there are only 650 copies of this album in existence. It is essentially impossible to find a physical copy of this album (especially now that Abe Vigoda are at least mildly popular) and it is rather difficult to find it online (the few links in existence are dead and you cannot even purchase it on iTunes).

As for the album itself, even a casual Abe Vigoda listener will notice how the band has progressed with each subsequent release to a more accessible sound. Whereas their most recent release Reviver is well-produced, dare I say, mainstream-sounding bit of post-punk, Sky Route/Star Roof is a poorly produced (though I suspect at least partially intentional) bit of noise rock obscurity. In fact, the album does not possess nearly as much of that tropical jumpiness later albums are replete with—what I have come to associate with the band with overall.

Juan Velazquez's vocals are buried beneath treble and light distortion, giving his voice an edge that later releases lack. In fact, the guitars are quite trebly as well, so much so that you can barely hear any bass whatsoever. Tracks like "Hilarious Glowing," with its repetitive, jagged guitar riff that nearly sounds out of tune, screechy vocals, and bombastic rhythm are somewhat reminiscent of AIDS Wolf—only somewhat, though, let's not get too wild with our comparisons.

Allow me to gush for a moment: I love this album. In many ways I wish Abe Vigoda was still the band I hear on this album, although I realize that if they were I would probably not even know of them because they would not reach a level of popularity that would carry them far from their home base. Guff.

Sky Route/Star Roof

I think I've heard this before. Oh, no, nevermind, he has an accent

This is Britain's answer to lo-fi. Pretty much every song sounds like the background music from an iPod commercial with a low production value. Regardless, it is mildly enjoyable in a small dose...which makes this EP just the ticket.

Is their name a reference to Wavves? Or, is it a reference to the AIDS Wolf album The Lovvers? Who cares, Lovvers probably won't matter in six months.

Think EP

Did E. Von Dahl killed The Matches?

Call me a teenage girl (or Ewelina....close enough....oh!), but I greatly enjoyed the Tim Burton-inspired pop-punk of The Matches. Sadly, they are about to go on one of those hiatuses that I believe will really just stand the test of time as a breakup. Seeing as they have never been a band as lucrative as...say...Blink-182, I do not see a multi-million dollar, heavily sponsored reunion tour taking place in the near future. Or any future for that matter.

The Matches were a little too smart, a little too talented, and a little too late to reach a level of measurable mainstream success. Their whole Beetlejuice-informed neo-gothic image unfortunately came after Good Charlotte monopolized the pop-punk market with their pseudo-goth punk branding in the early 2000s. Ultimately, Good Charlotte tainted such an image with ill-fitting bondage pants paired with black and white thick vertical striped blazers, relationships with Paris Hilton, temper tantrums on Punk'd (one of the finest pieces of investigative television of our generation, it makes 60 Minutes look like geezer tripe), and a sudden re-invention as a nu-new wave band riding the coattails, slim fitting dress pants, and skinny ties of Interpol, The Killers, and Franz Ferdinand.

What I find to be most unfortunate about The Matches "hiatus" is that what will now be their last album, 2008's A Band in Hope, was such a disappointment. Sophomore album Decomposer (2006) set the band apart from their Warped Tour peers and presented a new take on pop-punk—that is, dare I say, a type of avant-garde pop-punk. The tracks on Decomposer still posses the necessary elements to attract teen girls: songs about love, sing-along choruses, quotable lines that could be used on social networking websites to sound profound. However, the tracks also possess elements of left-of-centre musical experimentation: electronic flourishes, intricate guitar riffs, key changes, and the usage of more than 3 or 4 chords per song.

The follow-up, A Band in Hope, ultimately does not follow the model built by Decomposer. Most of the tracks on the album are more straightforward, accessible pop that do nothing to catch my interest. Unfortunately, The Matches fell victim to their own creativity—Decomposer did not sell particularly well. This caused the band to scrap most of their original follow-up album, The Mad Silentist, and opt to write a more accessible album. Apparently, only a few tracks from the original made it onto A Band in Hope, which I suspect are the few tracks on the album I actually enjoy ("From 24C," "Clouds Crash," "To Build a Mountain").

Now that the band is on "hiatus," solo projects have emerged from lead vocalist Shaun Harris and lead guitarist/backup vocalist Jon Devoto respectively. Thus far, each of these projects sound like they are shaping up to be similar sounding to The Matches. So why go on "hiatus" at all?

E. Von Dahl Killed The Locals

Decomposer

A Band in Hope

Paralleled Support

I started to read Adbusters in my last year of highschool. At the time I was in the midst of a period of political angst and my sheer ignorance on political events clouded my vision. On top of this, my father's newfound conservative religiosity further clouded my vision. I had a fair bit of trouble reconciling my Judaism Light (the low calorie alternative to Synagogue) upbringing with my father's insistence upon the unbreakable connection between Judaism and Israel--that is, any criticism of Israel is an abomination of one's Jewish faith. With my newfound interest in leftist ideals, I came upon a copy of Naomi Klein's No Logo, a book often referred to in leftist circles at the time as "the bible." Initially I found Klein's personal politics to be a bit of a conundrum: a young Jewish woman who is staunchly anti-Israel. It then took me years to make this startling realization: the entire left is anti-Israel. Only recently have I begun to understand why this is.

The recent comments by French President Nicholas Sarkozy regarding the burka, the sack-like head-to-toe covering worn by many Muslim women, may shape a new ideological war between the West and the Arab world. Sarkozy claims that the burka "is not a religious sign, it's a sign of subservience, a sign of debasement." Sarkozy's comments, although bordering on what many would consider discriminatory, actually are right on the money. Nowhere in the Koran does it explicitly state that women should cover any part of their bodies. Instead, the covering of women's heads and faces has been enshrined in the laws of Muslim countries such as Iran and Saudi Arabia--countries where women are essentially second-class citizens. Both of these nations have laws that are completely based upon Islam, so many inside and outside the Arab world make the connection between the burka/hijab and actual Islamic law as written in the Koran.

So where does the Adbusters clan come about in this scenario? Following the comments by Sarkozy, I have come to realize that the far-left has morphed into apologists for all things Muslim. Rather than defending the individual rights of Muslims who wish to freely practice their religion, even if doing so may be a practice of male subservience, I find that more often than not the left allows its anti-American agenda to overpower any rational debate on the matter.

When I first began taking an interest in Adbusters, I remember seeing a photo series on the magazine's website of a suicide bomber being thwarted by the Israeli Defense Forces--which ultimately involved three IDF soldiers taking the would-be suicide bomber aside and killing him. What irked me about this series was that it was presented in a manner by which the expected reaction of viewers would be outrage. I was indeed outraged, but more-so at the caption that referred to the bomber as a "liberator."

Rather than criticizing the West for its anti-Arab practices and standing up to defend all things Muslim, including suicide bombers, the left should align itself with Muslims in a different way. The left should unite with liberal Muslims (who account for the majority of those living in Europe and North America) to defend the rights of those who wish to practice their religion. Moreover, the left should act to remove the negative stigma attached to all things Muslim in the West. By essentially acting as apologists for all things Muslim, whether it be a woman in a hijab, the prisoners at Guantanamo Bay, or a suicide bomber in the Gaza strip, the left has made it easier for the West to classify everything Arab under the same category. A suicide bomber is not a liberator and a headscarf is not a threat to the liberty of the French Republic. Rather than counterbalancing vehement anti-Americanism with steadfast Arab support, the left should re-evaluate its ideals on a more situation-specific basis. Otherwise, they are just adding ammunition to the War on Terror's unfortunate offspring, the War on Islam.

Dead Idealistic Desperate Inventor Pioneer Philosophers

The Strokes popped onto the music scene during the "The" band craze of the early 00's. Remember that period? The White Stripes, The Hives, The Strokes, The Interpols. I paid them very little attention, though I did mildly enjoy their breakthrough hit "Last Night." Then they blew up and I looked the other way. Well apparently they put out two more albums after that and, quite frankly, they are pretty decent ones at that. Ultimately, The Strokes are the definitive band of the 00's whole garage rock thing. Sure, The White Stripes are pretty good at it too, but there is only so much you can do with one guitar and an awful drummer. What's more, check out this performance on Letterman from 2003:

I can only imagine that performing on a talk show in front of a studio audience of fat sweaty tourists must be at least a little challenging, but they more than pull it off here. Such nonchalant swagger and effortless attitude. Remember that episode of Flight of The Conchords entitled "New Fans" ? Good. I have a similar reaction to one of the groupies on that episode when I watch this video: Strokes, you are a rock and roll band. Not only do they have all the moves down-pat, but the musical ability to back it up.

That being said, what the hell is this:

Yes, quite a teaser. Although we are played for chumps and never actually get to hear Casablancas' voice on the track, I can only assume that his vocal style remains similar to his work with The Strokes. That being said, this really just sounds like a mildly electronic version of The Strokes. No thanks.

The Strokes - First Impressions of Earth

Wooden Body, Metal Face

The finalists for the 2009 Polaris Music Prize were just announced this week. The prize itself, established in 2006, claims to award the best full-length Canadian album of the year "based on artistic merit, regardless of genre, sales, or record label." Past winners have been artists who were slightly under the mainstream radar and not only crafted fantastic albums,  are slightly alternative in nature (though not to the extent to be inaccessible to mainstream audiences), but could actually use the $20 000 in prize money. 

The shortlist for this year's prize:

Elliot Brood, Mountain Meadows

Fucked Up, The Chemistry of Common Life

Great Lake Swimmers, Lost Channels

Hey Rosetta!, Into Your Lungs

K'Naan, Troubadour 

Malajube, Labyrinthes 

Metric, Fantasies

Joel Plaskett, Three

Chad VanGaalen, Soft Airplane

Patrick Watson, Wooden Arms

Ultimately I find this list to be commendable, if not slightly pretentious. However, there are two specific albums that stand out to me. The first is Metric's Fantasies, which as I have previously mentioned, is not so much an artistic endeavour as it is an album of heartless pop. Also, Metric is far too much of a household name at this point, they certainly do not need another $20 000. The second album is Fucked Up's The Chemistry of Common Life. I ultimately associate the Polaris shortlist with many of my U of T arts & science undergrads. Fucked Up is the only band on this list I could not see my thick-framed glasses-sporting cohorts being able to comprehend, despite the album's seal of approval from Pitchfork. 

Montreal's Patrick Watson won the 2007 Polaris for his album Close to Paradise. Though I doubt the judges would allow a repeat winner of the prize, I would not contest another victory by Patrick Watson. Wooden Arms is another superbly crafted album of lush soundscapes, replete with dreamy vocals, subtle experimentation, and just the right amount of catchiness. 

Patrick Watson - Wooden Arms

Fuck you, triblend

Ignoring the fact that this advertisement blatantly admits the company's hiring policy (and ignoring the fact that I went on lookbook...), I know several people who have been "laid off" by American Apparel over the course of the last six months. How can a company that is laying employees off due to the dire economic repercussions of the "recession" subsequently be hiring new employees? It is not to save money (assuming that new hires would earn a lower wage than those who have been working for the company for a while), as all American Apparel employees make the same wage and the company does not give raises. So honestly, fuck off Dov. 

Biased Review: NXNE 2009

Rather than downplaying my numerous biases, this chronological review of nxne will hinge upon them. See if you can spot where they come about. The first five people to do so will win a Gwendolynn's Convivial Fête t-shirt, emblazoned with our corporate logo™. 

Thursday June 18th

Chang a Lang @ Silver Dollar

Generally I am not a fan of feel-good, cutesy indie dance-rock. However, Chang a Lang is just too darn cute. They have the proper elements to generate at least a certain level of success. Singer/guitarist Brian Okamoto has the moves down-pat--at one point during their set he hopped off stage while ripping into what I would otherwise consider to be a machismo-fueled cock-rocking solo. However, he is so sexually non-threatening that it was simply a musical acrobatic feat that fit in well with their overall image. Bassist Jeanette Downing is the right amount of quirk and beauty to once again be sexually non-threatening--sure she's pretty, but not in an intimidating or directly sexy way. Beyond their look, Chang a Lang are simply talented musicians who have perfected the whole indie dance genre. 

Pace The Stairs @ Silver Dollar

By far one of the most energetic and enigmatic performances at nxne. Are they post-rock? Are they noise rock? Are they post-hardcore? Are they post-grunge? The Toronto "post-everything" trio faced a few technical problems during their set, but always managed to recover. A broken cord resulted in the band having to cut their set one song short and enact some on-the-fly song alterations, but PTS pulled through and made enough noise to piss off the bouncers (whom I saw frowning and plugging their ears). However noisy the band gets, it is a type of controlled chaos with identifiable song structure and more musical hooks than one may initially realize--even the bartender was nodding her head to the chorus of "Petalogy."

Give Us The Daggers @ Silver Dollar

What's in a name? Not nearly enough. Give us the Daggers may have a good name, but musically they are as lively as Easter dinner at the Goldstein house, if you catch what I mean, you anti-semite. Frontman Scott Waring may have a good look with his flowing strawberry blonde hair, but there is only so much visual stimulation one can provide when he and the rest of his band just stand in one spot for 40 minutes while cranking out one dull 70s-inspired song after another. 

Japanther @ Sneaky Dee's

Excuse my language, but Japanther is simply just a couple of fucking assholes. I don't understand what all the fuss is about them. They are musically untalented. They can barely sing. They are not easy on the eyes. Plus, during their set at Sneaky Dee's, the Brooklyn duo told the crowd to "fucking get with it" and "fucking come on" about 200 times. They are essentially just the Ramones.....if you took the Ramones and funnelled them through some ironic hipsterized electro-tinged shit machine, complete with frizzy hair and a hypercolor tshirt. Further proving me right, they briefly played the intro to "Blitzkrieg Bop" halfway through their set. What a fucking waste of everything. 

Friday June 19th

Little Girls @ PreLoved

I certainly have lamented over minimalist lo-fi post-punk. It is a flavour of the....year, I suppose. It is difficult to actually determine if any of these bands have any musical merit when drenched in that much reverb. However, I will say that Little Girls put on a decent live show. Considering all the songs were basement concoctions of Josh McIntyre, wherein he played all the instruments and sang all the vocals, the songs have actually translated well live with a full band. Sure, the drumming of Anthony Gerace is juvenile (his drumkit: kick drum, snare, floor tom, high hat). Yes, the bass player always sports a polo shirt. And yes, the guitarist is really creepy, to the point that he makes me feel funny on the inside. However, this is McIntyre's show and he runs it with a surprising amount of stage presence. Furthermore, at an event sponsored by Steam Whistle, I was on my fifth beer by the time the band played, so everything sounded good to me at that point, including the raccoons fighting out back. 

AIDS Wolf @ Sneaky Dee's 

Unfortunately, this was AIDS Wolf at their worst. Not to suggest they actually played poorly, but the Montreal noise rockers suffered from a terrible sound mix. Vocalist Chloe Lum asked repeatedly for her vocals to be turned up, but to no avail. A band that is as loud and chaotic as AIDS Wolf needs the sound to be just right, otherwise they sound like a musical insane asylum (which, I realize, some may consider them to be regardless... oh, if only we were all as musically enlightened as I). I simply could not get into their set and by the looks of it, neither could they. 

Mika Miko @ Sneaky Dee's

Perhaps they were worn out from the set they played two hours prior at Lee's Palace, but Mika Miko simply did not have it during this particular performance. What I assumed was going to be a girl-powered post-punk rah rah session ended up being a lackluster middle school pep rally for a team that won bronze. Vocalist Jenna Thornhill didn't even have her trademarked red telephone receiver microphone. For shame. 

METZ @ Silver Dollar

The Silver Dollar does not always have the best vibe for a hard-hitting grunge/hardcore band. METZ overcame the venue and put on an intense show. Hardly taking a break between songs, the band cranked out one screaming number after another. Singer/guitarist Alex Edkins' convulsive shaking has become endearing to me after seeing them a few times now. In a city that has far too many djs and indie bands, METZ and Pace The Stairs are a refreshing (though incredibly loud) change. 

Saturday June 20th

DD/MM/YYYY @ Horseshoe Tavern

Moments before DD/MM/YYYY started their set at the Horseshoe, their friend/manager/record label owner Eric Warner brought a bushel of two dozen balloons onstage. I assumed they were going to cut the string that kept them together and scatter the balloons all over the stage. Instead they remained in a clump snagged on vocalist/percussionist/occasional synth player Matthew Lyon King's microphone for the entire set and looked ridiculous. What was more ridiculous than the balloons was the fact that the sound mix was so awful. King's vocals were turned down so low in the mix you could barely hear him and despite his pleading for them to be turned up (at one point screaming "pleeeeeeease" repeatedly), it was never done. The band played well, as always, relying mainly on material from Black Square during their 40 minute set. 

DD/MM/YYYY, METZ, Japanther, Spiral Beach@ secret location

Four hours later, DD/MM/YYYY more than made up for the botched sound of their Horseshoe set with a fantastic super-secret latenight show in front of friends and a couple of jerks who heard about it through the grapevine and spent most of their time sitting on a curb outside hating me for no apparent reason (yes, I'm talking about Ellyn). Once again, the bushel of balloons was present, but this time I didn't mind them, as those of us at the front of the stage were tossing them around. Despite the fact that this secret show was not overseen by a professional sound technician, the mix was far superior to that of the Horseshoe. Not having to impress critics or promote their new album like at the Horseshoe, DD/MM/YYYY played a set that was more diverse, with a good mixture of old and new songs. 

As always, METZ rocked the hell out of the place and left my ears ringing. Their set wasn't any different than the one they played a night prior, but it still was fantastic. Thankfully, I arrived just after Japanther finished playing and, I would assume, sufficiently made asses out of themselves. The final band of the night was Spiral Beach. The band has been around for a few years but I had never had the opportunity to see them....and it turns out that was for the best. They put on a decent show, but ultimately I feel as though they are too much of a gimmick, not enough of a band. After three songs I had heard enough. Each song bled into the next and did not sound any different. The band is not as quirky or novel as their appearance would make you believe, they are a pop rock band in sheep's clothing--and a rather typical one at that.