3 May 2009

A flu by any other name...


I think it's a well-known fact by now (perpetuated by such bona-fide yid celebrities as Jason Biggs and Adam Brody) that, as a stereotypical whole, Jews are the neurotic black sheep of society, who will "Bahhhh" only when there's something to kvetch about, or when the caller ID displays their mother's number. Being raised in a pseudo-Jewish home by parents who would contradict their beliefs every fifteen minutes ("No, no, it's okay to eat shrimp as long as plastic utensils and paper plates are used...it was in the Torah"), I have immersed myself enough in the Jewish community and Jewish history to conclude that there is NOTHING that accounts for the neuroses of the average Jew. It's not like each preceding generation has had much war, persecution, mass killings, or Woody Allen films plaguing it. Ultimately, the biggest problem facing the average jew is what to do with all of the Jew Gold (or Gelt) one has accumulated from such momentous occasions as Bar/Bat Mitzvahs, finding the afikoman, and Ben Stiller Day. 

That being said, Israeli Health Minister Ya'acov Litzman's decision to refer to Swine Flu as Mexico Flu in all official government documentation is doing little to break the stereotype. Oy vei, yes, jews don't eat pork (unless it is done so with plastic utensils on a paper plate), but really, stop kvetching and just call it what the rest of the world calls it. Your people have been marginalized enough over the years, don't give the mighty Mexicans a reason to shun you as well. Israeli-Mexican relations should be a top agenda for the Israeli government, far above that Gaza Strip thing and organizing the Ben Stiller Day Parade.